Looking for something, not sure what it is.
Lately, I have been feeling like I need to get lost in something. You know the kinda feeling where you are just lost in the motion and don’t feel anything around you but the presence of just being.
Like eyes closed, dancing to your favorite song in the dark. Not caring if the motions are weird, you are just lost in the music!
Like that, everyday!
Does that make sense?🤔
Let see if getting lost in a book will do the trick 💭
As I should.
Go that way,
I will take the long way down
I will find my way around.
I saw a glimpse and I don’t like what I see,
The dissonance is draining, so
Am going back in, into myself
Basking in my solitude, sublime!
It takes a while to come back out,
So don’t hold your breath.
“This world is a comedy to those that think, a tragedy to those that feel.”
Horace Walpole
In a dark room with surround sound music, playing alternative/indie music. Sitting in your favorite spot, relaxed, eyes closed and a little tipsy.
Peace/Torture
Fragile mind
I don’t want to be described as strong or virtuous or any adjective that more or less describes the subtle art of perfecting suffering.
Hear Hear
I always thought I didn’t have an addictive trait or personality; boy, did I underestimate the incessant need to forget.
“Nothing is so common-place as to wish to be remarkable.”
― Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr.
Say what you wish, but i am yet to meet a human who does not feel some time of emotion once remarked.
Hell, there is a whole industry that banks on the continuous feelings that people get from remarks. Our ever-loving—soul sucking—but still worth-it social media platform.
Even our very own wordpress blog strives on remarks, hence the need to get more follower, likes, comment etc.
Am writing this now only because the realization just dawned on me. For a very long time I was one of those who vehemently believed I didn’t care what anyone remarks was about me until I began consciously writing and increasing my social media presence. Every like’s and comment i got was like an imaginary tap on my back telling me “you have done good”, which is ridiculous but very true.
P.S Ever tried letting out a quick scream while driving? you should….very therapeutic!
Golden Rule says, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”
I politely disagree with this rule. With my 20-someting years on earth I have had to rethink and change most things I thought were expected of me or the respected status quo, and the ‘Golden Rule’ is a philosophy that I currently have a problem with.
“Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”
Nicety…..I feel should be expressed only when it is really true. In public, when I somehow make eye contact with a stranger, they smile and return their face to normal all within one sec. It probably just me, but I find that very creepy. You.do.not. have to smile at everyone, forcing a smile when you clearly don’t mean it––especially when it is not needed––is not necessary but somehow expected.
“Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”
Throwing a large birthday party for an introvert, because everyone wants a party right?
There are more notable situations I could point out, but I think you get the gist already. I realize the main premise of the rule is related to other essence of life, but it is good to remind yourself once in while that People are inherently different, hence they should be treated the why they want to be treated!
There are moving parts to everything, the question is who controls the pulley.
odi
Cars have so many moving parts, but just one driver controls it. Such situations happens in almost every thing we do. That being said, it is a well known truth that in every situation someone stands to gain something, hence the need for a neutral third party. My point is, the several News outlet in America have something to gain on how they present their ‘news’, hence it is very important to listen to it as a neutral third party!
I know you found me
I know you love me
And as the seasons cultivates patients,
If you are not done working
am not done waiting
and while am waiting
am not waiting
As heaven lives in me
fam·i·ly
noun: family; plural noun: families
1.
a group consisting of parents and children living together in a household.
“Hey dad.”
“Hey, baby! How’s school going? Miss home already? Want me to come pick you up? I won’t tell your mum”
“Haha.., yes dad, I miss home, but not coming home yet. I just wanted to talk to you about something.”
“Oh, is something wrong?”
“Nothing serious, I just wanted to ask if I could get a room off campus? I know it not really safe or what we talked about, but the walls are really thin. Music is not allowed after light out, and I woke my friend up last night from my nightmare.” I explained.
“Oh.” he voiced. His always uncomfortable about these things, and that’s exactly why I called him instead of my mom.
“But, what if the same happens in the new place?” he reasoned.
“I thought about that, and that why am going to find a room with thick walls with a little distance from the other roommate or I won’t move out.”
“Hmm, I don’t like this idea, and your mom is definitely not going to like it.”
“I know, but I really don’t want to wake people up every night.”
“And you don’t wanna go see someone about this dreams.” he argued.
“Nothing yet dad, plus they’re just dreams.”
“When will it be, pup.” using his nickname for me.
He was quiet for a while. He hates that I don’t talk to someone about my dreams, but I argue that am fine because truly I am. Am not scared of the dark, I willing chose to be friendly, and I don’t have any other emotional problems aside from the scary dreams; it might sound weird, but am happy to come out with just bad dreams. I don’t think I’m emotionally, or physically strong enough to let myself remember my past. Deep down I know I had a horrible past, I see the result everyday when I look at my sister, but I don’t remember the exact details. The doctors that talked to my parents said my brain has chosen to repress the bad memory, and I couldn’t be more thankful.
Amara, my sister was adopted when she was eleven, and she started seeing a therapist immediately, courtesy of our parents. Although, they were trying to help, but the sessions had the opposite effect on her. Ama doesn’t talk, only on very, very rare occasion. Whatever she remembered scared her to silence. She is terrified of sudden sounds ,new people, open space and so on. Now you understand why I am happy with just bad-dreams, at least I get to live my life without fear.
“Alright, pup! Lemme talk with your mom about it” he finally said.
“Ok, thanks dad.” I replied knowing I have gotten my way.
“You wanna talk to your sister’s or brother?” he asked.
“Bow have been texting me nonstop, and I face-timed ama a few hours ago, is shel’s there?”
“Yh!, here he comes, love you pup”
“Love you too da-da.”
“Hey grace” Sheldon practically yelled in my ears.
“Hey buddy! How you doing, miss me yet?” We made a bet that he was gonna miss very much, pretty soon.
“Psst! Are you a controller, and will jump when I press the buttons?
“What are yo…..Oh, your stupid video game.”
“Yep, I didn’t even noticed you left the house, where did you go again?”
“Haha! Very smooth lil bro, very smooth, but I miss you tho..”
“Yeah, whatever.” he said timidly. His ten and he is already acts like a typical male.
“Alright kid, when mum get home tell her “I miss you” what did I say?”
“To tell mum “I miss you””
“Ha! You said it.”
“NO, I didn’t…..I was just saying what you said.”
“Same difference bro, gotta go now, love you..Ha! You said it” I hanged-up without giving him a chance to reply.
**Note to self**
Start looking for apartments.
GallopingCrazy 